


My heart misses its beats when I come closer to you

by Two_Divided_by_Zero



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Akechi trolls everyone, Attempts at marriage proposals, Established Shukita, Humor, M/M, Morgana condones murder, Phone drabble, Ryuji tries, Silly Boys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-23
Updated: 2017-06-23
Packaged: 2018-11-17 23:15:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11278779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Two_Divided_by_Zero/pseuds/Two_Divided_by_Zero
Summary: Akira loves Yusuke. Yusuke loves Akira. Akira wants to propose. Yusuke has no idea what is in store for him.Or: Akechi is simultaneously the best and worst wingman and internet memes lie (yet again). Poor Akira just wants to marry the boy of his dreams.





	My heart misses its beats when I come closer to you

**Author's Note:**

> BETA'D FOR ONCE! Everyone, please thank the lovely [Kurapixel](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/kurapixel/) for taking time away from her zine to spare you the comma-apocalypse.
> 
> The request this time was a failed proposal and really...it is 60% Goro and Ryuji being the worst bros ever and 40% embarrassment.
> 
> Well, hope you all enjoy!

“Holy shit, dude. Pace anymore and I think you might create enough static to cast a Zio spell in the real world!”

Morgana gave an involuntary twitch from Ryuji’s lap; he made an effort to apologize by mashing the cat's fur down his spine. It was an endearing, though misguided effort; Morgana ended up sinking his tiny fangs into the meat of Ryuji's arm.

Perched at the counter top, Akechi made no effort to hide his glee at their antics! “Ryuji, how many times do we have to tell you to _treat Morgana the way you'd treat a lady_!”

“Mmm nra-!”

“And no lady,” he tutted, “would appreciate being mashed into paste by your big, meaty paws!”

A bystander in his own home, Akira could only watch as Ryuji attempted to swing at Goro’s face, only to fall short due to the extra weight of an animal still dangling from his arms. The detective chortled and ducked beneath the counter, giving faux-girlish squeals of distress.

While it _was_ amusing (and honestly, should have been expected), that bogging sense of urgency returned. “Guys!”

“Just… lemme-argh!” Morgana was forcibly detached from Ryuji’s arm with a violent swing, “just let me beat the shit out if this little ass clown-”

“‘Ass clown,’ oh that's a new one! See and they always said you can't teach an old dog new tricks! Good boy, Ryuji!”

“Guys-!”

“ _Will you all just shut up?!_ ” Scraping himself from the floor with as much dignity as he could muster, Morgana hopped onto a nearby glass coffee table. His tail, normally sleek and soft, was entirely puffed out.

(If it wouldn't aggravate the situation further, Akira would've loved to take a picture for Haru and Futaba. He had a feeling their hearts would just melt.)

“Now, you-” Akechi made zero effort go look contrite -”need to stop being… I'd say a little shit, but…”

Akechi shrugged and left his refuge beneath the counter. “Fair.”

Blue eyes turned on Ryuji next. “And _you_ need to act less like a Neanderthal and focus on _why your friend called you both_.”

With a dainty lick to his paw, Morgana gave Akira a look equivalent to a baton pass from the metaverse. Your play, Joker.

Okay. Deep breath in. Deep breath out. “I'm going to ask Yusuke to marry me.”

“Gro-god _damn it_ , pretty boy!”

Elbow still firmly planted in Ryuji's gut, Akechi gave a genuine smile. “You've made your decision then?”

Nod.

“Well then, I suppose congratulations are in order!” He looked around the kitchenette before frowning lightly. “Oh,” he mourned, “there isn't really anything to make a toast with, is there?”

“A toast?” Akira blinked and _mercifully_ stopped pacing. A soft pink pleasure began to diffuse his cheeks.

“Will you just-” Ryuji grunted as he punched Goro hard enough in the shoulder for him to release the elbow prison, “fu-there! And hell yeah, a toast! Our man here is gettin’ hitched to the neurotic man of his dreams!”

Morgana squirmed his way into his owner's arms as Akira blinked stupidly. “He's not neuro-!”

“Hey, daddy issues! Go through the fridge and see if they have some beer stashed somewhere!”

“Not a problem! I know it's hard to duck down and look _way_ in the back sometimes, what with your bad knee and all!”

“... So, if you kill a detective, there's no one alive to investigate the case right?”

“You'd be doing the world a favor, Ryuji,” Morgana purred and snuggled in tighter.

Head still in the fridge, Akechi chimed in with, “Yes, Ryuji, because I am the only detective in,all of Japan and you're not in a room full of witnesses! Ooo, found something!”

Morgana folded his ears down. “I wouldn't say a thing.”

At that, Akira chuckled fondly and gave a quick scritch behind his ear. “Well, you're a cat, so….”

A bottle of Sapporo was unceremoniously slammed onto the counter. A head of brown hair and a pageant winning smile followed. “A toast then? To the happy couple? Isn't that what people normally do?”

“Oh right, like you're the expert on **normal** now!”

“Well, I'm certainly the expert on natural hair colors at least and might I add, Ryuji, your roots are getting rather dark. Don't you think it's about time for a touch-up?”

“Isn't it about time you go… fuck,” Ryuji cussed and shot a baleful look at Akira, “C’mon bro, help me out here!”

“Actually, isn't the reason you're here is because _he_ needs our help?”

 **Crack**. “I swear to whatever deity you believe in, pretty boy-!”

The sun was put to shame by the way Akechi positively _beamed_. “Why, Ryuji, you think I'm pretty? Why, I never…”he fanned himself like a melodramatic damsel, “I don't know what to say, this is so sudden and-!”

“I want to ask Yusuke to marry me.”

And just like that, the room went as silent as though a gunshot went off of. In an underground holding cell. Aimed at his temple…

_Moving on._

After blinking stupidly, Ryuji flopped bonelessly only a bar stool. “Wait, bro… I thought you asked him already? Last week, the fire works…?”

Morgana chose that exact moment to interject _that traitor_. “Nope, he wussed out!”

Unsurprisingly, Akechi leaned in closer with curiosity practically tattooed across his face. “When you say, ‘wussed out’..."

“Artist boy got caught up ‘taking in the culture and the beauty of Japanese culture!’ and our leader here got jealous because he wasn't getting enough attention.”

“Aww, Akira…” Akechi cooed in such a syrupy tone it could coat waffles. Moments like this made Akira miss the phony ‘who-me?’ innocent act he used to put on before the truth came to light.

(Thoughts like that always left him feeling guilty though. If anyone could understand wanting to be acknowledged - _to be understood for who they really were_ \- it was the phantom thieves. Former phantom thieves. Anyways…)

Just remembering... in an uncharacteristic show of shame, Akira buried his face in Morgana's soft fur.

“Dude, you've been together, for like…”

“Three years, Ryuji!” Akechi chirped, “not to interrupt, but I know mathematics is sometimes hard for you!”

“Three years! Aren't you used to his... ya know... by now?”

 _Wince_. “After all this time, do you still have to talk about him like that?”

Akechi saw fit to interject. “He did ask Ann to model for him after she laughed so hard, cola came out her nose. Said he wanted to ‘accurately capture the essence of comedy in that moment.’”

“Well, that…”

“ _Last week._.”

If this were the metaverse, Crow would've definitely staggered Joker just then.

“Seriously man, even you can't deny our resident artist is a resident space case. He spends so much time with his head in the clouds, he gets frequent flier miles!”

“Do you think he has to request ATC clearance?”

“... AT what now…?”

“... Ryuji, are you the one dating him?”

The oddly serious question knocked him off guard. “No! What are you-?”

“And Akechi,” Akira asked tonelessly, “are you dating him?”

Rather than respond, the detective propped an elbow on the bar and shook his head. Seemingly satisfied, Akira nodded.

“Well, I am. And I **love** him”-this was stated almost like a challenge - “and I invited you two here because I needed _help_ asking the man I love to be my husband.”

“Before you ask,” Morgana chimed in, “he didn't think the girls would have the correct... perspective.”

Ryuji shook his head rapidly as though to dispel an awful thought. “Oh dear god, can you imagine Ann? She'd probably suggest plying him with enough sweets to cause diabetes!”

Akechi grabbed the bottle of beer and rocked it in contemplation, forming a ring of condensation on the formica. “I can't see Haru being that awful to go to?”

Sweet Haru with her freakish strength (from hauling fertilizer) and a firm believer in the catharsis hypothesis…

“What about Makoto?”

“...”

“What?”

“She tried to ask me out once when I was already dating Yusuke. He didn't... take it too well?”

“‘Too well’?”

“Oh, right man you weren't with us for that! Yeah, she tried pulling him aside at LeBlanc and everything! Art boy just strolled up, cool as can be and promptly shoved his tongue down leader's throat. There was moaning and groping... shit went from 0 to 100 so fast! You missed out!”

“Hi, thank you I'm standing _right here_.” Red faced and frazzled, Akira was past regretting asking his friends for help. Sometimes, he forgot they were all kind of a bunch of asses…

Miracle of all miracles, Morgana was finally the voice of reason. “Am I seriously going to have to sit here a listen to you two _panting_ over a taken man, or are you going to step up and accept this mission?”

“Pa-pa...”

“Unlike Ryuji, I have no intention of intention of denying my interest.” 

This was said so... matter-of-fact. Akechi even held up a finger, a professor teaching a lesson on latent sexuality. “I think we as a collective (excluding Morgana) can all agree that Yusuke and Akira are both virile, _attractive_ young men-”

“Dude, did you just say ‘virile'-?”

“ **And** as such, to deny that such an interaction was no doubt extremely erotic and deny my regret at having missed it would to be to deny my very self!”

Ugly and blotchy red seemed to permanently sear itself into Ryuji's skin. “Dude…”

At this point, Akechi adopted a slight baby talk tone of voice. “And what did we learn denying our inner selves in the metaverse?”

 _Grumble,_ “It's bad an’ shit…”

The beer bottle was once more slammed into the counter (and Akira was forever grateful Yusuke was not here because that man was _fierce_ when it came to protecting their security deposit. “Ping pong! So, now that we both admit that we **both** can appreciate their... chemistry-”

“Morgana, if you love me at all, you will claw my throat out with your tiny claws-”

“We can move on to helping our friend here get hitched to the man of his dreams!” Following his grand proclamation, Akechi grinned at each of them so widely it was a little... unsettling. His smile...it seemed to get wider the longer the silence went on.

Akira wondered idly if it would stretch off his face, like some horrible caricature. He'd ask Yusuke to sketch it later, but considering the artist's...dislike...for Akechi…

(“I'm being irrational. The boy plots to _frame you for murder, saddle you with the blame for all **his** crimes_ and I'm the irrational one. Akira, I love you; you bring light to my life, _but sometimes I wish I could shake the idiocy right from your beautiful head_ -!)

Digressing… “So, you'll help me?”

“Oh, _we’ll_ help you,” the detective _purred_. “Right, Ryuji?”

“...Gimme that.”

The bottle is Sapporo was swiftly opened and chugged by Ryuji, leaving the other two to coo in amazement, “You are asking the wrong guy on all this, but fine. If artist boy is who makes you happy, let's get a ring on him!”

Akira gave a soft smile. “Thank you, all three-!”

“Wait, when you say ‘let's,’ do you mean _all three of us are proposing_?! My, that's quite scandalous!”

From his arms, Akira could fairly feel the smugness radiating from his pet. “Do you regret going against my advice and asking for help yet?”

Yes. “No.”

“Liar.”

\---

In theory, Akira understood what Akechi had been thinking suggesting an aquarium.

(Only in theory though because after everything with Shido was said and done, no one really felt like they understood him.)

Yusuke had this...thing...about color. Composition, gradation, shade, light source…

Living (and loving) this boy for three years taught him a certain...appreciation through osmosis, but there were still certain facets to art Akira would never understand.

(The closest he ever came to anything of artistic caliber was latte art and even that was subpar. He could almost do a kitten, though!”

An aquarium, Akechi assured, was the proper amount of cliche while still appealing to his love’s inner _artiste_.

(“There are, like, dolphins and shit. Don't people like dolphins?” “Of all the creatures, the most romantic you could think of is a dolphin? Ryuji, how are you still single?”)

The plan, if it could even be called that, was to start in the tropical fish. The lighting was generally lower to emphasize the natural luminescence of the fish, which would set the romantic tone.

Next came the circular tank with a turtle so old, multiple colors of coral were actually growing on it's back.

It was fitting, really, that it ended with the crustacean exhibit; after all, Akira could still remember Yusuke's tearful look of gratitude when he not only covered every meal, but paid the pet fee to allow Yusuke his newest pets as carry one on the plane back.

It had led to a rather sloppy first kiss in the TSA security line and, as they say, the rest was history.

Though, as far as first kisses go… Akira gave Yusuke a 2/10 for romance. **That** led Yusuke vowing to ‘make it up to him later’ and well...

Later...was worth waiting for.

Back on track though. Yusuke was still startling on in his own endearing way as his boyfriend subtly led him by the arm to the lobsters.

Everything was going, dare he say ‘swimmingly’ until...well...

 _Of course_ it would be the lobsters, Morgana suggested, it might as well end with them. “Begin again!” Akechi had argued and for once, there didn't seem to be any trolling undercurrent to his advice.

(Lobsters, Akira discovered through extensive research, were not immortal as the memes circulating the internet claimed. They grew and grew until eventually they grew too large and well...died. Corny as it was, that was a perfect metaphor for how he wanted their relationship to be; growing and loving each other every day until the very end.)

Once there were in front of the garishly lit touch tank with a single lobster, Akira took both his boyfriend's hands in his own. Luckily, Yusuke took that as a cue to go quiet.

“Yusuke…”

“Akira?”

He thought of Joker, of flipping through that stained glass window knowing what was waiting beneath and took the leap. “People used to tell me...when I found the right person...shit.”

It seems stage fright even affected (former) phantom thieves still. Luckily, he bad a man who looked at him like the moon and sun rose and set by him to spur him on. “I had...this whole speech ready and...”

Oh, they were beginning to gather a crowd. Despite the sudden whispering and staring, it seemed as though Yusuke only had eyes for his nervous wreck of a boyfriend.

The lobster though...wasn't really moving all that much. In fact, it seemed to be shifting a bit too much with the waves in the tank. No matter...

“Yusuke, my love for you is like that lobster…”

And just as he finished that sentence, _just as he had the stupid box in his fingers_ , some flustered teen in a monogrammed polo shoved past with a net and immediately scooped the lobster out.

Oh…

Oh my god…

_Was that lobster seriously dead?_

It took a few moments, but Akira could see the very instant all the light left Yusuke's eyes.

“Are you....breaking up with me?”

No no _no_. “Seriously? Of all the - I was trying to ask you to _marry me_!”

And in a final act of unluckiness, Akira slipped while trying to take a knee and ended up smashing his kneecap into polished concrete.

_Were those lights at the corner of his vision supposed to be there, or were the just jellyfish?_

Later at the emergency room, where he was told his kneecap had been fractured from the fall, Akira never stopped grinning once because _damn_ was it a nice feeling seeing a ring on Yusuke's delicate hands every time he signed another release document.

Limping around on crutches for three weeks didn't sound so awful with his _fianceé_ there at his side to hold his other hand.

**Author's Note:**

> Once again, thank you to [Kurapixel](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/kurapixel/) for helping me not publish complete unproofed nonsense for once. Please, drop her a line, DISCOVER HER FANTASTIC ART and send some love.
> 
> Thank you as always for reading! I actually received a Tumblr request for a Shukita wedding so if you enjoyed this, there is still more to come ;D
> 
> Comments and kudos are my,life blood! <3
> 
> Requests still open, but they will be slowing down a bit.... Though their is some potential NSFW on the horizon ;D
> 
> Thank you all again for reading and hope to see you again soon in another fic!


End file.
